missjuana.mason

Im not a cracker

Im a "saltine" american

They beat me at monopoly

they went to hell, straight to hell, did not collect $200

Hello Jim

Your Dildo Has Arrived

I got an hour less of sleep last night,

but now the clock on my car is correct, so I got that going for me, which is nice.

I want to hug you till you feel better

Then fart on your pillow

i can't believe what i did

for that klondike bar

they said my christmas sweater was ugly

so i used their skin to make a new one

They forgot my birthday

I forgot their asthma medicine

they always overpacked when we went on vacation

i managed to fit them all in one suitcase

what if april fools is really on april 2nd

and we have been april fooled all this time

Taco Bell forgot to make my taco supreme?

That's ok.

you get a snow storm! you get a snow storm!

and you get a snow storm!......everybody gets a fucking snow stooooorm!

Oh you can't stand other people lame assed post on facebook

tell me more about how you hate it in your glorious, uplifting post

aaaaaaaaand

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